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Being rejected always hurts, unless you’re a sociopath, or you work in a job like comedy, where rejection is the regular price of admission—then maybe it doesn’t hurt as bad, but it still isn’t a pleasant sensation, like a warm bath or a back rub is; it more resembles a paper cut on the soul.
I was rejected today by a comedy show I wanted to be part of. The email was very nicey-nice, but it was still irksome and frustrating. The fact is, the comedy world is a small community, and so it feels personal when someone says “no.”
What do you do when you’re rejected?
I wish I had something spiritual to say here, or deep, or profound, like, lean into your pain, or it’s OK to feel sad, or go eat some ice cream with your bestie, or accept the inner rage as an aspect of the healing process or something cool and wise like that. But I guess maybe I am alright with being broken, because when I get a rejection email, or a no, or a “no reply” / ghosting (which is as bad as a no, or maybe even worse) I have a little ritual I like to do.
I like to quickly acknowledge the feelings, then stuff those feelings so far down they metaphorically come out the other end—and then write.
I love the expression about how the best revenge is living well. So, I strive to do that. I strive to do my best, to live my wellest, to win.
Because that’s my goal and that’s my plan.
So I write.
Writing is the gasoline that fuels my comedic tank. I write songs, or jokes, or rewrite or edit things I’m working on. I write Museletter posts, too, but working on the material that will take me to all the places I want to be, where and when I will be undeniable, that is what I do when I get rejected.
It always makes me feel better.
Daily musings:
R.E.M. | YouTube
How to handle rejection | Psyche
This comedian went way deep into feeling rejected | Reddit
Anonymous venting | Psychcentral
Call this number if you’re feeling depressed | 988
Etc.:
Comedy info galore — $70 annual subscription! | Subscribe
6/8’s Poconos Underground Comedy (my show + birthday party) | EventBrite
Subscribe for sneak peaks at my new NSFW comedy album | OnlyFans
Your ad to 8k+ comedy fans for $40/wk | jess delfino at gmail dot com
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dear jess,
thank you for sharing this!
in answer to "What do YOU do when you’re rejected?" i have a lot of answers
and one of them is
"the same thing we do every day, pinky: be grateful for the people and things and experiences in my life and career and history and presence that i have and love and share and am and all"
i like your answer also!
thank you for sharing as always!
love
myq
hey!